Catching Dreams in all the Wrong Places

Disclaimer: This post was written during an episode of my-brain-feels-like-it's-full-of-cotton due to some as of yet not diagnosed malady (presumably a cold, allergies, pressure changing, exhaustion, or acute sinusitus), so if the topic seems irrelevant or the argument ad absurdum, it probably is.

So, I was driving down the road....and I noticed a problem. I've noticed this problem many times before, but this time (see disclaimer above for a sensible reason why), I was bothered. Bothered beyond the fleeting annoyance I often have when I notice this gross misuse of something with which I have very little cultural connection. 

These items are designated for the bedroom. The activity they are used to protect is explicitly forbidden whilst driving. In fact, driving when participating in aforementioned activity is dangerous, harmful, and commonly deadly.

The item in question is, of course, dream catchers.

Dream catchers are items mostly associated with Native Americans and their culture. They look like spiderwebs encircled by a hoop, often with leather strings dangling from the hoop with feathers and beads adorning these strings. The purpose of dream catchers is alluded to in their names. They catch bad dreams and allow the good ones to sift through, providing those protected by the proximity of the dream catcher with pleasant (or at least not unpleasant) dreams.

However, the problem resides in the dream catchers that are hung from the rear view window with suicidal stupidity. These individuals, clearly, wish to sleep, uninterrupted by nightmares, whilst in their cars, presumably while driving. These people will find that the web-like net of their dream catcher will not protect them from the living (or possibly dead) nightmare their lives will inevitably become from falling asleep behind the wheel. Having a dream catcher adorn your car will not keep you safe while you sleep and drive.

I repeat: HAVING A DREAM CATCHER WILL NOT KEEP YOU SAFE WHILE YOU SLEEP AND DRIVE.

Additionally, what is the point of having a dream catcher somewhere where you do not intend to sleep? How will it protect your dreams if it is in your car while you are in your bedroom? The bad dreams will sneak right past it and haunt your sleep.

However, those who live (and therefore sleep) in their cars may keep their dream catcher on their rear view mirror without mockery from me as long as they do not intend to sleep while driving.

For those who are not aware of what I am speaking, here is a picture of a dream catcher. Please, use them correctly.

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